M.I.A

I'm back! I know it's been awhile since my last post but I have been a "mother-in-action" hence my title :)
Since my last post so much has changed especially my little man. He is officially 5 weeks and 3 days old, and growing like a weed. We had his one month checkup Friday and he weighed 9 lbs 11 oz. and 21 1/2 inches long. Every day his face gets fuller and looks more, and more like a real little person. I love him dearly, but it has been the toughest month of my life. But I've also discovered more about myself as a person, and revealed a lot about my marriage.

As many of you know, Nick and I have only been married close to 5 months. So although we are new parents, we are also newlyweds...which is tough. As newlyweds, you expect that puppy love feeling all over again because your relationship has reached a new level. While we have had many of those moments, mix in being a new parent and those moments become fleeting. We have made an effort to set aside time for the two of us to be alone, but most of that time we spend trying to get things done or running errands. I knew beforehand that it would be tough adjusting because our lives have changed drastically but I didn't know it would affect our relationship so. I'm just praying that God continues to bless our marriage with patience and love. I know he wouldn't have brought us this far to let us fall apart.

More about the other things I have learned...sleep deprivation is real. I know I've spent the last 4 years as a college student and have had plenty of all-nighters but nothing compares to all-nighters with a new baby. When we first brought Elijah home, he was an angel. Slept all the time, we had to wake him up to feed and he never really fussed. Well once the jaundice wore off, a whole new baby emerged. He would cry in the middle of the night and nothing seemed to calm him. We guessed he had colic, which is normal but didn't make it any easier on us. Fortunately though, we've established a better routine and have been able to get some more sleep. Not as much as I'm used to, but enough to make me a functioning human being. Now I don't want it to seem like being a new mother has been all negative because it hasn't whatsoever. The little things make it all worth while like watching him smile in his sleep, or when he searches for my face when he hears my voice, when he falls asleep on my chest after feeding and most of all, those precious little feet. I love him unconditionally and he will always be the best thing that ever happened to me.

A few other "Eli"isms...
He loves to poop in a fresh diaper. Never fails. Every time we change him, minutes later he finds the urge to poop again.
He is a little piglet. When the boy is hungry, he's hungry. He eats so fast, that he sometimes forgets to breathe which scares Mom half to death.
Before he latches, he opens his mouth real wide and shakes his head all around almost like a bobble-head, it's priceless.
He's a thinker. He does this little pose where he puts his arm under his chin and it looks like he's deep in thought.

The Thinking Pose.

We just got his newborn photos done this week so more to come soon!

Oh, and hope every one has a wonderful and happy Easter!

The Birth of Elijah

So I tried very hard to write this on the one week anniversary of my little man's birth but being a new parent is tough, and time flies. Unbelievably though, it has been an entire week since I gave birth to the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. I can't believe how fast time flies and I already wish I could freeze time so he would never grow up. I wanted to share my birth story of how Elijah Ryan entered this world because I will never forget the moment my whole life changed.

Elijah Ryan Joseph

March 17, 2011 at 4:58 pm

7 lbs. 12 oz.

19 1/4 inches

We arrived at the hospital at 5 AM, nervous and excited that this was the day our little boy would be born. At the time of my arrival, I was already 2 cm dilated and 80% effaced so we were well on our way. Around 8 AM I had dilated to 3 cm and it was time to break my water. Everything they say about this is true, its warm and literally feels like your peeing yourself. By this point, my contractions were getting stronger because of the pitocin and I requested my epidural. Mind you I'm not really good with needles so I was mad nervous but I'd like to think I hid it well. However I was really afraid to get the epidural on my own since they don't allow anyone in the room other than the nurse and the anesthesiologist. However, the epidural wasn't really as bad as I thought it would be. Just slight pressure here and there. The worst part was the anesthesiologist leaving mid-epidural to incubate someone. Afterwards, we played the waiting game. I spent most of the day unable to feel my legs and switching sides every few hours. By 3 PM, I was 9 1/2 cm dilated and the contractions were longer and stronger. Even with the epidural I could feel the contractions. I decided not to increase the epidural because I wanted to be able to feel something in order to push when it came time. Which leads me to the hardest and most important part of this experience, the pushing aka the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Around 4 PM is when we officially started the pushing process which involved me holding my breath, while pushing as the nurse counted to 10 x 3. Eventually this because so exhausting. I could literally feel all my energy being drained from my body and my thirst was insane. All I wanted was water. As the baby was closer to crowning the real problems began. The baby's heartbeat got real high and then real low all too fast. Apparently my cervix was too small for the big guy and he was stuck in the birth canal. This part is real cloudy for me because I was drugged and exhausted, but Nick remembers everything vividly and has shared bits and pieces as we've looked back. Because things were getting real serious, one of my delivery nurses tried a new method and handed me a towel and we basically played tug-a-war to push the baby out. Surprisingly it worked and my arms were sore as heck for days afterwards. After 58 minutes of pushing, the doctors decided I wasn't going to be able to push this baby out on my own and had to use forceps to pull him out. Then panic set in because I didn't hear any wailing baby cry, instead all I could see was my son blue in front of me. Immediately I started asking, "Why isn't he breathing? Is he OK?" The nurses got to business quick cleaning him off and removing the fluid from his lungs. However they weren't able to remove all of it so he had to go to the nursery immediately to be monitored. I was so sad I couldn't hold my baby and spend the first hour of his life staring into his perfect little face. After delivering, I was too tired to even hold him up. It wasn't until 10 PM that I was able to really hold my son for the first time and it was indescribable. I fell in love instantly. He was the very definition of perfect and I couldn't get over the fact that I was apart of creating something so perfect. He was everything I'd ever wanted or imagined and more. I was so proud of me and Nick for what we had gone through and this symbol of our love. Experiencing birth is like no other experience ever, it will change your life and who you are forever. It really is the most magical thing I've ever been apart of. I guess after 9 months of a fairly easy and smooth pregnancy, a delivery of that magnitude balanced everything out. The books definitely didn't cover everything but that's okay because it just made it that much  more unique for me.

And now a week later, here I am. I'm loving every second of being a mother. Even the lack of sleep. It's crazy how your body just naturally adjusts to not sleeping. Elijah is the sweetest baby ever. He's always so calm and content. Sleeps all day and through the night. Doesn't really fuss over anything. All I ever want to do is kiss his perfect little face and hold him close to me. Although I really miss being pregnant (Surprise!), the bond of breastfeeding makes up for it. And everyday I can't get over my little creation of love. How much I love him already and want to give him my all and the best of everything. He has stolen my heart and I will never be the same because of him.

Well I know this is a novel of a post so I will leave you with some pictures of the birth! Enjoy!

Daddy holding Elijah for the first time.

First family photo.

Love at first sight.

Perfection.

The two loves of my life.

Farewell Pregnancy, Hello Baby

That's right this is my last pregnancy post before the little man arrives.

It's so surreal that tomorrow this time I'll be holding my son.

What brought about this sudden change is my weekly checkup revealed I had protein in my urine which is an indicator of preclampsia, high blood pressure in pregnancy.

Even though I dont' have high blood pressure the doctor wanted to induce to prevent future problems and because I'm well on my way.

2 cm dilated and 80% effaced as of Monday.

I went into the doctor hoping she would say something like, "Let's have a baby today" but I really was surprised when she meant it.

Pretty crazy too because I was just telling Nick earlier in the week that it would be cool to deliver on St. Patty's day.

Little did we know, luck was in our favor

& we will be delivering our own lucky charm tomorrow morning at 5 am.

I know I should be sleeping already but I feel like it's the first day of school tomorrow

& my nerves will probably prevent me from getting any sleep at all.

All in all, I'm pretty darn excited that the day has arrived and my little man will be in my arms finally.

So farewell pregnancy, it's been a pleasant experience and I can't say that I have any complaints

other than I'm really looking forward to sleeping on my tummy, seeing my feet again and being able to move freely.

But I will miss rubbing my tummy, and especially miss feeling Elijah moving around inside me.

It really is an indescribable bond.

Practically 37 Weeks

& my fellow prego, Elisa!

Dear Elijah,

I love you so much already.

You are so loved by so many.

 I can't wait to kiss your perfect face,

and hold you every night until you fall asleep.

Nothing has been more rewarding than becoming your mother.

I can't wait to meet you tomorrow.

I love you.

Love, Mommy

The next time I post Elijah Ryan will be here!

Please keep us in your prayers for a safe and smooth delivery!

36 Weeks & Almost there.

I'm officially 9 months :)

I've been feeling exteremly tired, large and overwhelmingly ready for my son to be here.

Since my lost post, Nick has come home and has been a huge help.

We managed to check off all the remaining items off our baby necessity list (carseat, stroller, monitor)

and start/finish the nursery in one weekend. Of course, my handy man is the one responsible for all we accomplished. He really has been a team player as it's been a lot harder for me to get around and what not.

Not to mention the killer contractions that have kicked in. This past Sunday I thought for sure I was going into labor because I having contractions for 3 hours and they were ranging between 5 to 7 mins apart, lasting 30 secs to 2 mins long. But eventually they faded away and I was disappointed because I had mentally prepared myself that Elijah was coming.

In the midst of all the pain and excitement, I have made progress which means he'll be here sooner than we expected.

As of now:

Elijah weighs 7 lbs and 6 oz.

I'm 1 cm dilated and 80% effaced.

Which means... Elijah will be here in the next two weeks. If he hasn't arrived by the end of next week, the doctor is planning to induce!

All very exciting news but I feel as if any day could be the day.

But mentally I'm way more prepared. Our bags are packed, the nursery is complete, the carseat is installed and my husband is home.

So now it's just a matter of time and the waiting game begins.

Here are a few shots of the nursery:

We're still missing artwork and his elephant mobile but I'm absolutely in love with it.

A big thanks to my hubby for putting it together for me and Eli. :)

35 Weeks

I can't believe I'm already 35 weeks. It seems like just yesterday we found out we were expecting and now we are counting down the weeks until he is here. What a week this has been though and it's only Wednesday! I had a doctors appointment Monday and everything was normal. I measured 35 cm and I am 1 cm dilated and 50% effaced. Of course silly me didn't even ask what "effaced" meant, but leave it to Nick and good ol' google. Effaced is when the cervix begins to thin out in preparation for the delivery. Even though that sounds like I could be going into labor any day...it's perfectly normal for first time mothers to be dilated and effaced for weeks before delivery. However, yesterday I thought for sure I was going into labor because my mucous plug came out. Again, wth right? The muocus plug seals the opening of the cervix and you normally lose it before going into labor. So of course I'm freaking out...Nick isn't home yet and I'm about to have a baby. "I'm not ready" was all I kept thinking to myself! But once again, the doctor said that was normal and I didn't lose all of my mucous plug, just some of it and it would happen more often as I got closer to delivery. Now I feel like any day I could be going into labor and there's so many things I still have left to do! To top off, I seemed to have gotten this rash known as PUPP, it's red hive-like bumps on my abdomen and stretch marks that itch like crazy! And what do you know.. doctor said it's normal, that it occurs around the the third trimester and goes away after delivery. So now I'm dilated, effaced, lost my mucous plug and I'm breaking out in hives! What a week, right?

On the bright side, all of this means I'm only closer to having my baby here. Thankfully, Nick comes home in 3 days (YAY) so that will put my mind at ease and it will be great to have his help around the house as we prep for baby. I'm getting really excited and nervous because I don't feel like I'm ready but I don't think you ever really are "ready". Many moms have told me it just comes naturally. I'm praying that they're right and that everything goes well. But I could use all the prayers I can get :)

The Joys of Pregnancy

Sorry it's been awhile since my last post. It's been on my to-do list but that seems to be never ending these days. A lot has been going on and I've been a busy little bee. First off, thank you for all the positive feedback on the blog. I'm really excited that so many people support me and my love for writing, as well as my journey in motherhood and marriage. It's exciting and there is something new everyday, and I am happy to share it with all of you!

Since my last post I have officially entered into the final weeks in my pregnancy. I'm not quite 9 months, I will be 35 weeks on Monday but all of those not so lovely pregnancy symptoms have set in. And I'm so not loving it. I can't really complain about my pregnancy because up until now it's been wonderful. I never got morning sickness, never had any outrageous cravings (I crave cinnamon and orange juice for those wondering) but these last few weeks have been killing me! My feet, face and hands have swelled up. I pee every hour, on the hour. I can no longer see my feet. I can feel my hips spreading apart and preparing for what's ahead. My back is constantly aching. And I don't mean to complain but feel that I should share these things with all of my expecting friends and those that will one day experience it...it will happen to you so prepare yourself. If anything it's made me even more anxious for Elijah to be here. He's constantly on the move, rolling here and stretching there. Lately he loves to kick my ribs but only on my right side. I can feel him growing every day and couldn't be more excited. But that is also a constant reminder of how little time I have prepare until he arrives. Luckily, the hubby comes home in 6 days!!! For those that don't know, Nick works offshore in Canada and has been gone for almost 9 weeks. It's been the longest we've ever been away from each other and words can't express how ready I am for him to be home. It's tough being away from your best friend, your lover and your partner but I am grateful to have someone like him that is willing to be away from everyone and everything he loves to provide for his family. God has truly blessed me. I love my boys more than anything :)

Before I go I have to mention my baby shower which took place last weekend. My best friend, Kennan, was the host and did a fabulous job! I was so happy with the turnout and glad to see all my friends. It's crazy how much we've all grown up. Some are married, having babies and others are graduating college or getting their masters. I'm just grateful for all their love and support. We got some adorable outfits and toys, plenty of bath stuff -we will no doubt have the cleanest baby known to mankind - and tons of other great helpful things. Thank you to everyone who came and especially Kennan for your time, money and the effort you put into the shower.

Me and my sister, Rachel at the baby shower.

34 weeks

I promise to update after the doctor appointment on Monday. Hopefully we get some good news!!

Beautiful Soul

I've been particularly dreading this past week because of the anniversary of a friend's death, Krysta Rodriguez, was Friday. I can't believe it has already been a year since she passed. I kept thinking back to the day I found out and could remember every single detail. It was hard for me then and still is. I don't think it's ever easy getting over losing someone you love. I still see her smile daily and wish so badly that she could have been at my wedding or be able to meet Elijah. But I know that because of her all of this is possible. She is my angel and has blessed me with everything I could have ever wanted. Elijah may never meet her but I will tell him about what a kind, loving, happy and beautiful soul she was. And I pray that he one day will befreind others and see life with the happiness that Krysta did.

R.I.P Krysta Michelle Rodriguez

9/9/1987 - 2/11/10

Always Missed but Never Forgotten

On a lighter note, I've been nesting like crazy lately. Not the cleaning kind of nesting but the craft kind. (If that kind even exists) I've had the urge to be artistic in any way I can. I'm currently in the process of making a baby scrapbook, an elephant mobile for his room and painted a ceramic elephant piggy bank with his name on the butt. (Too cute, I'll post pics soon) I love knowing that every item I make for him is made out of love and something he can have forever and one day pass down to his own kids. I'm getting ahead of myself, but still it's a great feeling being able to channel my love artisticly for my son. I also have officially ordered all of the furniture for his nursery! (YAY!! *sigh of relief*) I can't wait to get started on the nursery. I have so many cute ideas and am awaiting patiently to bring the image in my head to life. I will be sure to keep you posted during the process. Of course, we are waiting for Daddy to get home to put the crib together and hang the final pictures. So until then I will be cleaning, washing his adorable little clothes and organizing until I pop. Speaking of, I'm 33 weeks tomorrow :) We have a doctors appointment in the morning and I will defintely post what the doctor says. Until I will leave you with what I have so far of my elephant mobile:

I'm in love with it already.

(If it's not already obvious, I'm obsessed with elephants for Elijah's room. There's just something catchy about Eli the elephant or maybe just the fact that they both start with an "E".)